Tech + Lifestyle

games, gear, and googleplexes (joke)

Demoman Intervention, Pt. 3

If you didn’t read Parts I and II, here’s the scene: Demoman’s team has set up an intervention for him. He just can’t let go of the booze, poor guy. Scout and Sniper are now dead as a direct result of a) their bungled intervention and b) Demoman’s insanity. Now, here’s the thrilling conclusion(!):

Medic: “You’re out of control, my Scottish friend.”

Demoman: “Bah! You don’t even know what out of control means! I’ll show you out of control!”

*Demoman sticky-jumps, then sprays grenades in all directions. Pure, unadulterated chaos ensues. Spy is in bloody little pieces all over the parking lot.*

Demoman: “What do you think now, hmm?”

Medic: “Do you vant a second opinion? You’re also ugly!”

Demoman: “You and your precious ocular symmetry! If ah had a head full of eyeballs like you, ah wouldn’t waste ’em by healin’ folk. Ah’d be killing – twice as much!”

*Pyro laughs and gestures menacingly toward the Medic with his flamethrower*

Engineer: “Aaaah!”

Medic: “Danke! Zees man is crazy!”

Engineer: “No, not you! I’m behind schedule!”

*runs off to a semi-fortified corner of the lot*

Engineer: “Eee-recting a dispenser!”

Demoman: “Good lad! Might this dispenser serve whiskey?”

Engineer: “What? No!”

*Demoman starts crying. Again. There’s an awkward pause. Again.*

Heavy: “I can have sandvich?”

Medic, muttering: “Vat simpletons.”

END SCENE

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June 11, 2009 - Posted by | Gaming, Humor, PC gaming | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

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